A man had an incident over sitting down in DFS

Man Confused by Ejection From DFS After He ‘Just Wanted a Seat’

William Wright was last week left dazed and confused after he was forcibly ejected from a DFS store in Newcraighall, Edinburgh while “just wanting a seat”. Mr Wright informed The Haggis Times that he’d become…

Share Read More

Oxgangs Primary school in Edinburgh was damaged in a storm

Scottish School Walls ‘Made out of LEGO’

Freedom of Information requests have revealed that the spate of Scottish schools closing due to collapsing walls is because they were secretly made of Lego. The Haggis Times submitted the request after Lego was spotted…


"Gies yer money"

Edinburgh Completes Evacuation

Edinburgers have completed their evacuation of the city after the annual Edinburgh Fringe Festival commenced at the end of last week. Edinburgh can now be confirmed as made-up of 55% English people, 20% foreigners, 15%…


Trainspotting 2 confirmed as an alternative sequel to The Terminator

Trainspotting 2 Confirmed as Sequel to The Terminator

The startling rumours that T2: Trainspotting 2 might be set in the Terminator universe have turned out to be true, after being confirmed in the film’s first teaser trailer. Director Danny Boyle has been credited…


Trams in Edinburgh, looking resplendent

Inquiry into Overbudget Edinburgh Tram Project Goes Wildly Overbudget

The cost of the inquiry into why the Edinburgh Tram Project’s costs spiralled out of control, has spiralled out of control. The not-at-all-short tramway line stretches a commendably worthwhile distance of 8.698 miles between Edinburgh…