Scone Referendum Settles Pronunciation Debate for a Generation

A table of moderately appetising scones.A table of moderately appetising scones.

The recent scone pronunciation referendum result is in: sense has prevailed.

Scotland continues to lead the way in correct pronunciation of scone, which is to rhyme with ‘gone’, and has saved the UK from a shameful result, as its 80+% resounding victory pushed the correct pronunciation into the majority.

Correct Pronunciation of Scone

Analysts have suggested that if you’re in the minority, you’re wrong.

Burt Brinkley of the University of Robert Burns commented: “Obviously, a minority opinion is a wrong opinion, so it’s very pleasing to see the referendum deliver the correct result. It’s also unsurprising that the further you get away from Scotland, the more likely you are to find an incorrect opinion, and knowing them, you can bet they know fine well how they should answer and they’re actually just at it.”

Seven percent of the UK claimed to not pronounce scone like either ‘gone’ or ‘bone’, with some opting to pronounce it so as to rhyme with ‘town’, ‘yoon’, and ‘apple’.

Scotland will return to the polls next month to confirm ‘salt and sauce’ is an abomination.

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